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January 15, 2010
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There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
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January 14, 2010
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I have friends who swear they dream in color; I say it's just a pigment of their imagination.
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January 14, 2010
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Drink your coffee; there are people in India sleeping.
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January 13, 2010
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There's no future in time travel.
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January 12, 2010
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Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
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January 11, 2010
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How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
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January 10, 2010
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I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
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January 9, 2010
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If you jogged backwards, would you gain weight?
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January 8, 2010
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Beat the 5 o'clock rush, leave work at noon.
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January 7, 2010
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If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
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